Your True North: How to Discover The Value in Uncertainty
Life just feels better when we can trust and rely on that things will work out the way we want them to. The likelihood of our life always working out the way we want it just isn’t true.
Yale Professor Laurie Santos teaches the school’s most popular course, The Science of Well-Being, which tackles the psychology of personal happiness, debunking common myths and providing actionable, science-backed steps to feeling more fulfillment. A crucial part of this journey is in identifying the value that certain activities may or may not provide for us in our daily lives. (Resource: https://www.businessinsider.com/guides/learning/yale-professor-of-happiness-course-shares-advice-on-how-to-be-happy#professor-laurie-santos'-advice-on-how-to-feel-happier:)
When life becomes uncertain, we may feel doubt and fear creep in at the edges, and eventually, this feeling can become a crippling fear, eliciting feelings that only fuel the fire of uncertainty. It is during these times that we can always turn to our internal compass, our personal values to guide us through life.
What are values?
Personal, core values are what matter most to us and motivate the actions that we take. They guide our life decisions when consciously engaged and can create a stable base of support during times of change and transitions.
Values can be at the individual, community, and collective levels. For the purposes of this article, I will focus on individual or personal values. But please be aware that the other two (community and collective) influence us in other ways such as our social trust, and positive or negative belief in humanity.
The process of uncovering your personal values takes introspection and is not something you can just pull from a list of words. One needs to engage their head, heart, and gut to honestly assess what one value. Therefore, this process is not solely an intellectual one. As mind, body, and spirit work in synchronicity, so do the internal processes that help us define our values.
When I work with clients on exploring values, I often ask them to consider the following questions by checking in with their head, heart, and gut. Noticing the visceral feedback your body sends you as part of the process:
Explore a peak moment in your life – What was present for you? Who were you with? What made this moment a peak moment?
Explore a moment where you felt disappointed, angry, mad, or upset. What contributed to these intense feelings? Why was that important?
Reflect on your final moment in life. What will your life have been about? Who did you want to be? What did you contribute to the world?
Did you know that anger, excitement, and happiness can all affect the motility of the gastrointestinal tract? In a 2002 study, conducted on patients with irritable bowel syndrome in Manchester, UK, they were able to observe the critical role our mind plays in our body’s functions.
Moving Into Intentional Change
Fall is a transition season and a great time to pause, reflect and make intentional changes in your life.
Like any discovery process, it’s important not to judge or criticize what comes up. We live in a culture that values looking outside of ourselves for answers to who we are. Yet within, you already have what you need. Taking time to get quiet and look inward is a valuable skill to cultivate and only helps to support such a practice of discovery.
When was the last time you checked in with your core values? I often find that many of my clients have never asked themselves this question. So, if we don't know, what are we living for then? If you are feeling your life needs some centering regardless of the cause, the practice of coming home to yourself is a great starting point.
If you have a list of values already when was the last time you visited them? How might your needs have shifted and where might you tune up your life to support those needs? I invite you to take a look and let me know how you have seen your own values shift since you wrote them. I would love to hear more! You can email me at angelina@3elements.space
No matter where you are, our lives always have a level of certainty amidst uncertainty. Your inner compass is the way forward.
Fall is a great season to pause, reflect and move forward with intention. Join me for my Fabulous Fall Check-In, a 7-day email series beginning September 22nd (the Fall Equinox). I will share ways you can simplify your life and live with more intention.
#mindfulnessforbeginners #consciousness #wellbeing #thoughtleader